Which are we more likely to regret: something we did do or something we didn't do?
Are we more likely to regret that drunken late night phone call, or not telling a certain someone how we really felt about them before they left?
Working at a job that we don't enjoy, even though it pays well, or not following our dreams and passions, even if it's hard to etch out a decent living from them?
Choosing to leave in order to chase our dreams, or choosing to stay for the sake of loved ones?
We all do things that we regret, and we all regret not doing things as well. But which of the two are we going to wish we had a second chance at: of righting wrongs and undoing past mistakes, or seizing opportunities that are probably never going to reappear in our lifetime ever again?
I'd say, if it makes you happy, go for it and don't look back. :)
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Friday, April 15, 2011
The Pursuit of Happiness
I know what you're thinking: it's missing Life and Liberty, as the phrase goes in the US Declaration of Independence.
But...happiness. What is it, really?
Is it having everything we need and want in life? Be that fame, fortune and/or maybe even someone else by our side?
Is it being able to wake up every morning with a smile on your face, without a worry in the world? Or maybe even waking up next to a special someone?
But why do we strive to be happy?
Why do we do anything and everything in our power to be happy?
I guess, happiness comes from having meaning in our lives. Something to live and breathe for. Something to fight for and protect. Something that makes us want to get out of bed each morning, and that puts a smile on our faces as we fall asleep each night.
Happiness comes from knowing we're not simply on this Earth just because we happened to be born into it. That we're contributing and making a difference, no matter how small, and no matter to whom or what. That we mean at least something to someone and cannot leave the world without significantly impacting on their lives, be they friends, family or lovers.
But could we still be happy, without all of those things?
But...happiness. What is it, really?
Is it having everything we need and want in life? Be that fame, fortune and/or maybe even someone else by our side?
Is it being able to wake up every morning with a smile on your face, without a worry in the world? Or maybe even waking up next to a special someone?
But why do we strive to be happy?
Why do we do anything and everything in our power to be happy?
I guess, happiness comes from having meaning in our lives. Something to live and breathe for. Something to fight for and protect. Something that makes us want to get out of bed each morning, and that puts a smile on our faces as we fall asleep each night.
Happiness comes from knowing we're not simply on this Earth just because we happened to be born into it. That we're contributing and making a difference, no matter how small, and no matter to whom or what. That we mean at least something to someone and cannot leave the world without significantly impacting on their lives, be they friends, family or lovers.
But could we still be happy, without all of those things?
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Loneliness
Sometimes, the loneliest of people are the ones who are surrounded by the most people.
You'd think otherwise, but no. The more people there are, be they family, friends, acquiantances or strangers, the more distant and lonely one can feel.
In a fast-paced world where everything seems to zoom past in a flash, it's easy to get left behind all on your own; when you want to slow down, but the rest of the world demands that you catch up.
That's when loneliness kicks in.
You'd rather stop and stare, while the rest of the world flashes a quick glance before moving on. You're standing still, while the world's a blur of people moving all around, not taking notice of you or knowing you even exist. You'd rather take things slowly, while everyone else urges you to move quickly, in a world consumed by instant self-gratification and narcissism. You're the only sane person in a world gone mad, the voice of reason amongst a collective chaos of noise, lies and foolish decisions.
More often than not, however, the best company one can have is simply oneself. Just you and you alone, whether it be lying on the bed staring up at the ceiling, or sitting at the beach watching the waves and the gazing at the infinite horizon.
But then again, two's company and three's a crowd.
Maybe with a close friend by your side, perhaps enjoying a deep conversation or staring in companionable silence at the empty space in front of you. After all, silence is golden; sometimes the best things are said when words aren't spoken at all.
Loneliness isn't when you're all alone by yourself. It's when you're all alone while being surrounded.
You'd think otherwise, but no. The more people there are, be they family, friends, acquiantances or strangers, the more distant and lonely one can feel.
In a fast-paced world where everything seems to zoom past in a flash, it's easy to get left behind all on your own; when you want to slow down, but the rest of the world demands that you catch up.
That's when loneliness kicks in.
You'd rather stop and stare, while the rest of the world flashes a quick glance before moving on. You're standing still, while the world's a blur of people moving all around, not taking notice of you or knowing you even exist. You'd rather take things slowly, while everyone else urges you to move quickly, in a world consumed by instant self-gratification and narcissism. You're the only sane person in a world gone mad, the voice of reason amongst a collective chaos of noise, lies and foolish decisions.
More often than not, however, the best company one can have is simply oneself. Just you and you alone, whether it be lying on the bed staring up at the ceiling, or sitting at the beach watching the waves and the gazing at the infinite horizon.
But then again, two's company and three's a crowd.
Maybe with a close friend by your side, perhaps enjoying a deep conversation or staring in companionable silence at the empty space in front of you. After all, silence is golden; sometimes the best things are said when words aren't spoken at all.
Loneliness isn't when you're all alone by yourself. It's when you're all alone while being surrounded.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
A little something...
It's not about the breaths you take or the breaths you take away.
It's how you breathe.
It's how you breathe.
Friday, February 04, 2011
What you ought to be, what you can be, what you will be
Be strong enough to know when you are weak, and brave enough to face yourself when you are afraid.
Be proud and unbending in honest failure, but humble and gentle in success.
Never substitute words for actions.
Don't seek the path of comfort, but face the stress and spur of difficulty and challenge.
Learn to stand up in the storm, but have compassion for those who fall.
Master yourself before you seek to master others.
Have a heart that is clean, and a goal that is high.
Learn to laugh, but never forget how to weep.
Reach into the future, but never neglect the past.
Be serious, but never take yourself too seriously.
Be modest, so that you will remember the simplicity of true greatness, the open mind of true wisdom, and the meekness of true strength.
From General Douglas MacArthur's Sylvanus Thayer Award acceptance address. Credit goes to American Rhetoric for the speech. The full text of the speech is here.
Wednesday, February 02, 2011
Fate vs. Free Will
The eternal question. Are we in control of our own destinies and futures, or are there deterministic forces that are out of our control and render free will an illusion?
You could argue that we're in control of our lives and thus our destinies. If anything, we make our own Fate. Everything that we do and all the conscious decisions we make directly affect us, with consequences that sometimes cannot be foreseen. You could take the view that nothing in life happens for a reason. That whatever happens, happens. More often than we'd like, things happen to us that simply have no shred of meaning, no matter how much we search. Such random things puzzle us and make us question the existence of Fate. Would Fate will such things upon us? I think not.
It would be naive, however, to think that we are in control of absolutely everything. Of course, there are some things in life that we just cannot control, no matter how much we wish we could. Like whether you'll do well on an exam or test even though you've studied your arse off and did the best you could. Or whether the object of your affections feels the same way about you. Or whether you'll win a scholarship or competition you've spent months preparing for. Those things are out of your hands. Not in Fate's hands, but in the hands of the other party/parties: the examiner; or the one you admire; or the judging panel. The voice of Fate isn't nagging at their minds, telling them what to do, feel or decide. It's all up to them, and nobody else. And if things don't turn out the way you hope they do, well then what can you do? That's that. No use thinking it's Fate, because there were two parties involved; and Fate was not one of them.
But at the same time, it would be much easier to base everything that we do or that happens to us, good or bad, as the will of Fate. It's like making an excuse for things; just because Fate willed them, we push the blame onto Fate and refuse to take responsibility for them. It serves as a strange sort of refuge from the harsh realities of the world; like "I'll leave it up to Fate" or "Fate had it that I did this/that this happened to me and I'll have to accept it."
Imagine a guy's about to suicide. He jumps off a building, but miraculously survives the fall, albeit with serious injuries. It's not unreasonable for him to think that perhaps Fate willed for him to live, not for him to end his life so abruptly. He then concludes that he's been given a second chance at life, and proceeds to then make the most of it while he still can.
Of course, it would be easy in that case to believe that Fate really does exist. But then again, what if, just by chance, he happened to not fatally injure any vital organs as he landed, thus ensuring his survival?
We can choose to believe either one of those theories; that Fate really did give him a second chance, or he just so happened to not sustain fatal injuries. But will we ever really know? I don't think so.
I guess all we can do is stick to whatever comforts us in the relevant situation. Whether it is accepting the will of Fate or acknowledging other real-world factors that are beyond our control, we seek refuge in trying to find a reason for what happens in our lives. Depending on different circumstances, we tend to believe in either one, but sooner or later, we realise that we can never really be sure of which one exists and which doesn't.
Shall we leave it up to Fate or Free Will to decide that?
You could argue that we're in control of our lives and thus our destinies. If anything, we make our own Fate. Everything that we do and all the conscious decisions we make directly affect us, with consequences that sometimes cannot be foreseen. You could take the view that nothing in life happens for a reason. That whatever happens, happens. More often than we'd like, things happen to us that simply have no shred of meaning, no matter how much we search. Such random things puzzle us and make us question the existence of Fate. Would Fate will such things upon us? I think not.
It would be naive, however, to think that we are in control of absolutely everything. Of course, there are some things in life that we just cannot control, no matter how much we wish we could. Like whether you'll do well on an exam or test even though you've studied your arse off and did the best you could. Or whether the object of your affections feels the same way about you. Or whether you'll win a scholarship or competition you've spent months preparing for. Those things are out of your hands. Not in Fate's hands, but in the hands of the other party/parties: the examiner; or the one you admire; or the judging panel. The voice of Fate isn't nagging at their minds, telling them what to do, feel or decide. It's all up to them, and nobody else. And if things don't turn out the way you hope they do, well then what can you do? That's that. No use thinking it's Fate, because there were two parties involved; and Fate was not one of them.
But at the same time, it would be much easier to base everything that we do or that happens to us, good or bad, as the will of Fate. It's like making an excuse for things; just because Fate willed them, we push the blame onto Fate and refuse to take responsibility for them. It serves as a strange sort of refuge from the harsh realities of the world; like "I'll leave it up to Fate" or "Fate had it that I did this/that this happened to me and I'll have to accept it."
Imagine a guy's about to suicide. He jumps off a building, but miraculously survives the fall, albeit with serious injuries. It's not unreasonable for him to think that perhaps Fate willed for him to live, not for him to end his life so abruptly. He then concludes that he's been given a second chance at life, and proceeds to then make the most of it while he still can.
Of course, it would be easy in that case to believe that Fate really does exist. But then again, what if, just by chance, he happened to not fatally injure any vital organs as he landed, thus ensuring his survival?
We can choose to believe either one of those theories; that Fate really did give him a second chance, or he just so happened to not sustain fatal injuries. But will we ever really know? I don't think so.
I guess all we can do is stick to whatever comforts us in the relevant situation. Whether it is accepting the will of Fate or acknowledging other real-world factors that are beyond our control, we seek refuge in trying to find a reason for what happens in our lives. Depending on different circumstances, we tend to believe in either one, but sooner or later, we realise that we can never really be sure of which one exists and which doesn't.
Shall we leave it up to Fate or Free Will to decide that?
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
The Riddle of It
It can make you whole, or tear you apart.
It can raise you up, or bring you to your knees.
It can make a hero of the meek, or a fool of the arrogant.
It can put you on top of the world, or bring you down into crushing depths of despair.
They say that if we are raised devoid of it, we will never know it.
With it your days are brighter, but also clouded in grey.
It transcends all sense of logic, and casts aside rationality.
In its presence, everything else seems to disappear.
It has the power to heal, but also the power to hurt.
It has the power to redeem, but also the power to corrupt.
It has the power to ignite wars, but also the power to cease them.
It has the power to forgive, but also the power to avenge.
Even if we had a million reasons to leave it, we would still find one to stay.
Even though it may be small, it can still fill gaping holes in our soul.
Even when breaks us, we end up being stronger than ever.
Even though we may give up on it, it never leaves us, or forsakes us.
We all seek it, but become powerless and vulnerable in the face of it.
It is our greatest strength, but also our greatest weakness.
We would give up anything and everything for it, and it for us.
And sometimes, in order to find it, you have to stop looking for it.
What is it?
It can raise you up, or bring you to your knees.
It can make a hero of the meek, or a fool of the arrogant.
It can put you on top of the world, or bring you down into crushing depths of despair.
They say that if we are raised devoid of it, we will never know it.
With it your days are brighter, but also clouded in grey.
It transcends all sense of logic, and casts aside rationality.
In its presence, everything else seems to disappear.
It has the power to heal, but also the power to hurt.
It has the power to redeem, but also the power to corrupt.
It has the power to ignite wars, but also the power to cease them.
It has the power to forgive, but also the power to avenge.
Even if we had a million reasons to leave it, we would still find one to stay.
Even though it may be small, it can still fill gaping holes in our soul.
Even when breaks us, we end up being stronger than ever.
Even though we may give up on it, it never leaves us, or forsakes us.
We all seek it, but become powerless and vulnerable in the face of it.
It is our greatest strength, but also our greatest weakness.
We would give up anything and everything for it, and it for us.
And sometimes, in order to find it, you have to stop looking for it.
What is it?
Monday, September 06, 2010
Imagination
It's everything not related to the real world or your waking moments.
It's quite simple, really. Just picture yourself living in a place and time that doesn't exist yet, or perhaps once existed. Picture the people, the surroundings, the vibe of the place. Then, thrust yourself into an adventure of your own, be it escaping from some thugs out to get you, to finding out that you're the lost heir to a long-forgotten throne, or to battling a villain who slaughtered your entire family. Simply put, let your imagination run free and flow in an endless stream.
The list could go on forever. But that's the beauty of imagination: anything is possible.
It's the best escapism one can ever find. It's all the fantasies we could never live out in real life, all our dreams come true and all our wishes granted, even if it's only from that small corner of our mind that plays them out right before our mind's eyes.
Basically, it's everything that life isn't.
It's our shelter from the real world when we find that we cannot face it. It takes us to a safe place, where we control everything and nothing can ever go wrong. It's consolation, comfort and support, not provided by someone else, but by the workings of our mind. It may be just a trick of the mind, but oh what a trick it is.
It's our sword and shield. Our army and fortress. Our aggressor and pacifier. Our battleground and safe haven. But moreover, our will, strength and support, to keep us going no matter what.
It's perhaps the best gift that we as humans have.
We cannot escape the realities of life. But we can seek sanctuary in our imagination.
It's quite simple, really. Just picture yourself living in a place and time that doesn't exist yet, or perhaps once existed. Picture the people, the surroundings, the vibe of the place. Then, thrust yourself into an adventure of your own, be it escaping from some thugs out to get you, to finding out that you're the lost heir to a long-forgotten throne, or to battling a villain who slaughtered your entire family. Simply put, let your imagination run free and flow in an endless stream.
The list could go on forever. But that's the beauty of imagination: anything is possible.
It's the best escapism one can ever find. It's all the fantasies we could never live out in real life, all our dreams come true and all our wishes granted, even if it's only from that small corner of our mind that plays them out right before our mind's eyes.
Basically, it's everything that life isn't.
It's our shelter from the real world when we find that we cannot face it. It takes us to a safe place, where we control everything and nothing can ever go wrong. It's consolation, comfort and support, not provided by someone else, but by the workings of our mind. It may be just a trick of the mind, but oh what a trick it is.
It's our sword and shield. Our army and fortress. Our aggressor and pacifier. Our battleground and safe haven. But moreover, our will, strength and support, to keep us going no matter what.
It's perhaps the best gift that we as humans have.
We cannot escape the realities of life. But we can seek sanctuary in our imagination.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Fighter: A Poem
Another one I wrote, at home this time. :)
Fighter
Beaten down and broken
About to come undone
Abandoned by my brethren
I lie among the fallen
And see the lights of heaven.
My strength will never falter
My resolve will never waver
My will shall be my armour
For I am a fighter, ready as ever
In the face of the enemy, never will I quiver.
As I begin to fade
I am not afraid
Then I ask myself
What do I have to live for?
So much, I cannot ignore.
Hope and faith
They live in me like wraiths
They keep me going when all is lost
Yet never let go when I know I should
They are my greatest allies in whatever I do
But at the same time, my greatest enemies, too.
"Let go, surrender," says one
"Keep holding on," the other whispers
"You are spent, gone and done
Death, you cannot outrun,"
Hisses one.
"But," says the other
"You are a fighter
You cannot give up
Finish this fight
It is your birthright
Rise, unflinching warrior
The battle lies yonder."
I turn away, and run from the lights
To burning cities, unfinished fights
The bitter foe, a blight I must smite
For I am a fighter, fearless as a knight
A battle ignites, with the enemy in my sights.
This one perhaps best exemplifies what I strive to be: a fighter in everything I do. Indeed, hope and faith are my greatest allies, but also my greatest enemies at the same time, too. A blessing and a curse, but one that is imperative for survival in this harsh world.
Fighter
Beaten down and broken
About to come undone
Abandoned by my brethren
I lie among the fallen
And see the lights of heaven.
My strength will never falter
My resolve will never waver
My will shall be my armour
For I am a fighter, ready as ever
In the face of the enemy, never will I quiver.
As I begin to fade
I am not afraid
Then I ask myself
What do I have to live for?
So much, I cannot ignore.
Hope and faith
They live in me like wraiths
They keep me going when all is lost
Yet never let go when I know I should
They are my greatest allies in whatever I do
But at the same time, my greatest enemies, too.
"Let go, surrender," says one
"Keep holding on," the other whispers
"You are spent, gone and done
Death, you cannot outrun,"
Hisses one.
"But," says the other
"You are a fighter
You cannot give up
Finish this fight
It is your birthright
Rise, unflinching warrior
The battle lies yonder."
I turn away, and run from the lights
To burning cities, unfinished fights
The bitter foe, a blight I must smite
For I am a fighter, fearless as a knight
A battle ignites, with the enemy in my sights.
This one perhaps best exemplifies what I strive to be: a fighter in everything I do. Indeed, hope and faith are my greatest allies, but also my greatest enemies at the same time, too. A blessing and a curse, but one that is imperative for survival in this harsh world.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Why "The Notebook" sucks
Just watched The Notebook last Saturday. I'd heard a lot from people that it's really good, they all cried watching it and whatnot, so since it was on TV I decided to watch it and see what the fuss was all about.
Guess what.
It sucks. Balls.
It was ridiculously unrealistic; honestly, who in their right mind waits 7 freaking years for someone? And when you're young and stupid, you don't know what that silly thing called love is; relationships don't last very long and moreover, aren't deep at that age, even more so when there's a huge distance between the two.
In reality, if two people were to have a summer romance, then part ways after that, and not have any contact whatsoever with each other over 7 years, surely they would have moved on, if not forgotten about them?
The two lovebirds claimed that "what [we] had was real."
Yeah, real my ass. Like the two of them, at that age, would know what real love is. Like love at first sight even exists in the first place. Consumed by passion and nothing more, that was really all they had.
If the movie was being realistic, then when Allie went back to Seabrook to visit Noah, she would've just found out that even though it really wasn't over at that time, and he really did write to her, except her mother kept the letters from her, she's moved on and is about to get married to someone else. At the most, they would've remained good friends, knowing that they once shared something.
But that wouldn't make for the soppy, formulaic, romantic movie that's bound to rake in millions and bring girls to the cinema in droves and have them leave in tears, now would it?
Hollywood blatantly exploits the emotional powerhouses of the female demographic, sacrificing quality for monetary gain. And that's why I like indie/arthouse movies better than a lot of mainstream commercial movies. Sure, I don't mind the occasional mindless shoot-'em-up action movie (as long as there's a comprehensible plot and awesome effects :P), I enjoy some thrillers, sci-fi, fantasy, even the occasional drama, and I adore the 'not-exactly-old' classics that I grew up with watching over and over again countless times...........but romance? I reckon that's the one genre Hollywood does badly. There are of course, a few exceptions, such as Casablanca, but really, Hollywood still has a long way to go in perfecting the art of the genre.
Hey, let's not forget that The Notebook was based on a novel, by that ever-popular romance writer Nicholas Sparks, author of fellow weepies Dear John, A Walk to Remember, Nights in Rodanthe, etc, etc. But check this out (click on it for a larger view):
Seems the writing world has a long way to go too. Don't say I didn't tell you so. :)
Credit for the picture goes to Cracked.com. :)
Guess what.
It sucks. Balls.
It was ridiculously unrealistic; honestly, who in their right mind waits 7 freaking years for someone? And when you're young and stupid, you don't know what that silly thing called love is; relationships don't last very long and moreover, aren't deep at that age, even more so when there's a huge distance between the two.
In reality, if two people were to have a summer romance, then part ways after that, and not have any contact whatsoever with each other over 7 years, surely they would have moved on, if not forgotten about them?
The two lovebirds claimed that "what [we] had was real."
Yeah, real my ass. Like the two of them, at that age, would know what real love is. Like love at first sight even exists in the first place. Consumed by passion and nothing more, that was really all they had.
If the movie was being realistic, then when Allie went back to Seabrook to visit Noah, she would've just found out that even though it really wasn't over at that time, and he really did write to her, except her mother kept the letters from her, she's moved on and is about to get married to someone else. At the most, they would've remained good friends, knowing that they once shared something.
But that wouldn't make for the soppy, formulaic, romantic movie that's bound to rake in millions and bring girls to the cinema in droves and have them leave in tears, now would it?
Hollywood blatantly exploits the emotional powerhouses of the female demographic, sacrificing quality for monetary gain. And that's why I like indie/arthouse movies better than a lot of mainstream commercial movies. Sure, I don't mind the occasional mindless shoot-'em-up action movie (as long as there's a comprehensible plot and awesome effects :P), I enjoy some thrillers, sci-fi, fantasy, even the occasional drama, and I adore the 'not-exactly-old' classics that I grew up with watching over and over again countless times...........but romance? I reckon that's the one genre Hollywood does badly. There are of course, a few exceptions, such as Casablanca, but really, Hollywood still has a long way to go in perfecting the art of the genre.
Hey, let's not forget that The Notebook was based on a novel, by that ever-popular romance writer Nicholas Sparks, author of fellow weepies Dear John, A Walk to Remember, Nights in Rodanthe, etc, etc. But check this out (click on it for a larger view):
Seems the writing world has a long way to go too. Don't say I didn't tell you so. :)
Credit for the picture goes to Cracked.com. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)